Burma Shave

In the mid 1920s, the American Safety Razor Company began posting sequential road signs all along the pre-interstate two lane roads advertising their Burma Shave shaving cream. The distinctive signs were red with white lettering, spaced about a hundred feet apart. Each contained a line of a humorous verse, while the last sign sported the Burma Shave slogan as punctuation. By the sixties these signs were being devoured by the colossal billboards so familiar to roadgoers today. The last Burma Shave sign was taken down in 1963.

Spring has sprung
The grass has riz
Where last year's
Careless drivers is
Burma Shave

Cautious rider
To her reckless dear
Let's have less bull
And lots more steer
Burma Shave

Unless your face
Is stinger free
You'd better let
Your honey be
Burma Shave

Proper distance
To him was bunk
They pulled him out
Of some guy's trunk
Burma Shave

A beard that's rough
And overgrown
Is better than
A chaperone
Burma Shave

The hobo lets
His whiskers sprout
It's trains—not girls
That he takes out
Burma Shave

We can't provide you
With a date
But we do supply
The best darn bait
Burma Shave

Heaven's latest
Neophyte
Signaled left
Then turned right
Burma Shave

To steal a kiss
He had the knack
But lacked the cheek
To get one back
Burma Shave

Why is it when
You try to pass
The guy in front
Goes twice as fast?
Burma Shave

She put a bullet
Thru his hat
But he's had
Closer shaves than that
Burma Shave

We're widely read
And often quoted
But it's shaves not signs
For which we're noted
Burma Shave

Around the curve
Lickety-split
Beautiful car
Wasn't it?
Burma Shave

Our fortune is
Your shaven face
It's our best
Advertising space
Burma Shave

If Crusoe'd kept
His chin more tidy
He might have found
A lady Friday
Burma Shave

The bearded devil
Is forced to dwell
In the only place
Where they don't sell
Burma Shave

"No, no," she said
To her bristly beau
"I'd rather
Eat the mistletoe"
Burma Shave

These signs are not
For laughs alone
The face they save
May be your own
Burma Shave

The hero was brave
And strong and willin'
She felt his chin—
Then wed the villain
Burma Shave

At intersections
Look each way
A harp sounds nice
But it's hard to play
Burma Shave

Car in ditch
Driver in tree
The moon was full
And so was he
Burma Shave

Passing school zone
Take it slow
Let our little
Shavers grow
Burma Shave

A peach looks good
With lots of fuzz
But man's no peach
And never was
Burma Shave

Don't take a curve
At 60 per
We hate to lose
A customer
Burma Shave

Don't lose your head
To gain a minute
You need your head
Your brains are in it
Burma Shave

Violets are blue
Roses are pink
On graves of those
Who drive and drink
Burma Shave

My job is keeping
Faces clean
And nobody knows
De stubble I've seen
Burma Shave

He tried to cross
As fast train neared
Death didn't draft him
He volunteered
Burma Shave

Although insured
Remember, kiddo
They don't pay you
They pay your widow
Burma Shave

If you don't know
Whose signs these are
You haven't driven
Very far